Home » The Wall » IN MY HUMBLE OPINION PT. 13


Hello and greetings, first time we meeting (maybe). Ah hope yuh not leaving, juss stay ah lil bit.  I’ll keep it formal, please juss act normal.  I grow up in de, house of bacchanal……..OH BACCHANAL.

Good day CaribWallians.  I have returned.  I have held back on giving the 13th installment of In My Humble Opinion cuz I knew the 13th one had to be REHL good.  Well last night, I got all I needed to be able to do this today.  Yes if allyuh reading this, it was something I posted on Instagram, Twitter & Facebook last night. Lemme give allyuh the situation:

First things first……For those that don’t know what a Footprints is….It’s a Caribbean Bar & Grill here in Brooklyn.  If you’ve never been there use your imagination on what it possibly looks like.  So boom, check it right……Yesterday I was having the worse day I possibly had in a long time.  My head was hot & my heart was heavy, so I decided to walk out my house and go for a drink or 5.  I walked in and saw my padnah sitting in my normal seat by the bar (yes I have a normal seat, I was one of the first ppl to spend money in that mofo).  The only seat by de bar was right next to him so I grabbed it up one time. Talked to him real quick, ordered my drink and sat there thinking.  He was there with somebody on a small kinda scene so I wasn’t tryna disturb him too much.  After a while he told me he was leaving. Now there was a single seat down at the other end of the bar closest to the back of the place & 3 ladies were waiting for a seat by the bar so the bartender Livi asked me to shift down to the end so the ladies could sit together…..Big Mistake…LMAO

So I go down to that side of the bar that is kinda dark.  Ended up sitting next to another friend of mine, Comedian Brooklyn Mike, cracked some jokes & ordered another drink.  Now like I said before I had the world of problems on my brain so I sat there with my hat off (which is a big key to this whole situation) holding my head and thinking.  The band started playing so now I’m sitting at a 45 degree angle looking towards the stage (and for those of you that know Footprints, I was at the far end looking towards the cash register kinda).  The band was sounding pretty good.  Man buss out a Beres and sang it clean.  Ppl were in there swaying and ting.  Then KABOOM!!!!!!!! Somebody standing by the entrance door to the bar swayed a bit too much to the left & my eye ketch ting.  Exactly what the picture says.  Somebody I know WIFE sitting there with somebody I know HUSBAND….OH BACCHANAL

Now I know somethings are innocent.  There are male & female friends.  Shit, I go out drinking all the time with my homegirl all the time.  But no one can watch us and think we are together.  If anything we have more of that awkward, first date kinda look to us….LOL. But its because its innocent.  We go out, drink, talk shit, then she goes home to her house…I go home to mine…And the next day the texts me & tweets to the world about how I tried to destroy her life….HAHAHAHA.  This what I was watching was different.  Yes I REHL macco de scene.  All kinda hold hand and kissing back of hand and eye gazing going on.  Allyuh jam next to each other on 1 side of the table? Nah man. Footprints tables too small for dat for no reason.   Worse yet I sitting a good ways away from them, in the dark & without my hat on. Most ppl doh recognize me without my hat on.

One time I posted this pic up & my phone started to go off like crazy.  I sat there for a while again, maccoing, then decided lemme try to make my great escape without them seeing me.  I put on my coat and started walking toward the door like I was on some real creep shit. Tried to stay low and avoid too much light and ting.  But that shit eh work. Ah bounce up my padnah & a next DJ friend of mine and had to turn to say whats up. So now de horn couple see me.  Well de look on their face was like “Outta all de ppl wo could see us in here in would be that big eared fukka”.  Me, being the huge cacahole that I am, turned and with a big smile said “Oye, allyuh good?  I eh self see allyuh sitting dey.  Ah gone tho, liquor kicking in bad”. LMAO.  My & my DJ padnah walk out. He goes to his car & I take de couple blocks long stroll back to my house dying laughing the whole way.  End of story.  OH BACCHANAL

So my point is……How much of a backside you have to be to be in Footprints with somebody you eh supposed to be with in that kind of precarious situation?  Any & everybody does walk in Footprints.  And you go be in there on some lovey dovey shit with a next man wife and/or husband?   Look how easy ppl does look to get they head buss.  Go someplace where you eh go get catch so easily nah man. Go in Bay Ridge or Mill Basin.  Shit, run up in the city. There are 2 million bars & restaurants in the city.  If you get catch out there, that means you were meant to get catch.  But then again the 2 ah dem not smart anyhow.  Both of them are married to US citizens & their paperwork eh go thru yet (I be knowing).  And the man loving up a ting that not self as sweet as his wife big toe.  His name in my brain right now is Isaac Hunt (say it fast, yuh go catch it).  I not particularly condoning a horn eh….but I know shit does happen.  Just doh be all outside & outta timing with it.

Well last night my price was $500 for the info.  It gone up today to $1000 cuz somebody saw that pic last night & sit down stewing on it whole night.  Somewhere somebody didn’t know where there spouse was yesterday evening and their brain hot.  It’s Christmas time.  I have people I have to buy gifts for.  This heffa Rockstar have expensive taste.  Tings hard outta road.  Gotta make a hustle out of anything…Ya dig!

Well I pushing out a lil bit. Got work to go do.  If yuh feel its you get a lil horn, link me.  I’ll give you my pay pal info or bank account.  Once I see the transaction registered, I’ll give you the answer.  And this is no bullshit, this is a true ting that happened.  if I have to split the money with my DJ padnah for him to confirm it I swear I will.   BTW, I take almost anything for Christmas.  I go take a roll of wrapping paper and all if you wrap it up and put a bow on it for me.  Show Skinny some love nah man. I’m not just good looks and a great sense of humor. I have feelings too. LMAO.


Link allyuh ah next day….Lata!

De $hit Talk King




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One Response so far.

  1. Missy says:


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